Family Democracy

I was six years old when I was introduced to politics.  It was the election year of 1980 and my family lived in Georgia, the home state of one of the candidates, Jimmy Carter.  It was an exciting time for state pride although the other candidate, Ronald Reagan would go on to become president.  I had no idea what a presidential election really meant, but the charged atmosphere was enough to get my precocious mind thinking.

"Daddy, what party are you?"  I asked.
"I am whatever our president is," he replied.

At the time, I did not react to that answer. I was looking to hear one of two responses and I did not understand what he meant. Almost thirty years later, I consider it a beautiful and simple statement that has enormously influenced the way I live my life.

I remember when Reagan was up for re-election and ran a brilliant campaign commercial using the song, "I'm Proud to Be an American," with scenes of "real" America - farms, steel mills, churches and coal miners.  I was ten then and still did not understand the scope of politics, but I was hooked.  I was proud to be an American.  Considering the landslide victory that year, I think much of America felt this way.

Growing up, I had no political affiliation although I followed politics somewhat.  I wasn't a taxpayer and I wasn't old enough to vote, so I did not think it necessary to take a side.  I took what my dad said to heart.  I turned eighteen and started my first year of college in the election year of 1992.  I excitedly registered to vote in our campus mailroom.  Given the choice of party affiliation, I chose "Independent."  Now, don't get me wrong, I went to one of the most liberal colleges in the country and I've only voted in one direction the last seventeen years.  Yet, I valued my Independent status.

I vote in every election.  Sometimes my candidate wins and sometimes a different candidate wins.  The majority has spoken.  As an adult, I have strong opinions on the issues, but I haven't forgotten the lesson from my father.  In fact, I find it quite intellectual to understand and debate the opposite of what one thinks. I find it more rewarding to be compassionate and empathetic to other people's thinking than to bully others into my opinion.  That doesn't stop me from shaking my head in frustration, but I will listen respectfully.

It was not until later that I would understand that my dad was a citizen of his birth country India; thus, he was not able to vote in the 1980 election.  Despite this, he was and is well-versed in politics, current events, international news, and local affairs.  A lack of a vote did not mean apathy.  I've noticed that he takes the diplomatic route rather than the divisive one in most situations, whether presidential politics or family politics.  He has strong opinions, but he methodically weighs the arguments of both sides.  I am proud to be my father's daughter.

First Snow

The little one experienced his first snow last Sunday.  I wish it had come on Xmas Day, but it was still a happy day to take him outside.  One of my aunty's had given him a snow suit when he was born, which we used to dress him up.  She had given us a size 9 months snowsuit, so I had thought we'd never be able to use it but since the little one is truly a little one, he fit into it at 10 1/2 months old.  Of course, he absolutely hated it because it made him immobile and this is not a boy who likes to lie on his back or sit around.  We sunk him into mounds of snow and captured many photo moments.  Sadly, he wasn't enchanted with the snow, but we found him adorable. 

Christmas Gift!

Did you know that "Christmas Gift!", and not "Merry Christmas," was the greeting originally spoken on X-mas morning and that the first person saying it would receive a gift?  

 

My parents had immigrated from India and did not know much of American customs, so we did not begin celebrating the holiday until I was eight.  That's when we moved to Plymouth and were surrounded by  a Christmas hysteria that we had never witnessed before.  I think the snow and cold weather brings the festive spirit alive much more.  I also think that in the 70s, Christmas hadn't peaked in its mass appeal. 

My family was always hazy on the customs.  I never believed in Santa Claus and I am thankful for that.  We had a fake tree and wreath and electric candles for the first few years.  We got our first live tree when I was in high school and I enjoyed decorating it and smelling the fresh pine needles.  I did not like the mess.  I loved Christmas and Hannukah songs.  My mom would cook a special dinner, such as pot roast or meatloaf.  We made Christmas cards.  We went sledding and built snowmen.  I was excited about Christmas break from school. 

The big tradition, the one many people associate with Christmas, of exchanging gifts was one that did not catch on in my family.  We are not gift givers.  We do get thoughtful gifts for each other throughout the year, but we were hot and cold with the idea of Christmas gifts.  Some years we'd wrap up gifts and other years no one would do anything.  Sometimes, we'd tell each other the gift or outright ask someone what to buy, thus killing any surprise element.  I'm happy that I didn't grow up with an emphasis of gifts.  We didn't torture ourselves to finish Christmas shopping during the holiday rush or pick up generic gifts just for the sake of gift giving or believe that this was the only time of the year to do something nice for each other. 

Of course, that doesn't mean I don't appreciate a good Christmas gift.  I may be contradicting myself, but I love getting gifts.  Who doesn't?  Memories of gifts I did receive are very special, especially since I don't need to weave through memories of unused picture frames or cop-out calendars or useless gadgets or compulsory gift cards.

My most memorable Christmas was when I was ten and I woke up to find a wrapped box with my name under the decorated tree.  "Christmas gift!"  I was the only one with a package.  I unwrapped the box and amazingly it was a Cabbage Patch Kid.  A preemie named Ellie Oriana to be exact.  This was when Cabbage Patch Kids were the hot ticket item and I had been on the waiting list for months.  Apparently, the store had called a few days before Christmas and my dad and brother had gone to get it.  They managed to wrap it up and sneak it back tot he house without me seeing or knowing.  I was ecstatic -- words cannot express the joy.  This was the first time I'd ever had a Christmas Day surprise.

Many Christmas days have passed since then and I've received several gifts.  My parents bought me a brand new car at one point.  My preemie doll is somewhere in my parents' basement.  I lugged it to school in the fifth grade and then the fad ended.  That one memory lives on, though, because I remember the huge smiles across my parents' and brother's faces as I unwrapped the box and expressed my shock and delight at what I saw.  They were more excited than I was.  That was my favorite Christmas gift.

"Merry Christmas"

Say You Want A Resolution

 That's not how the lyric goes in my favorite Beatles song, but I'm not harboring any revolutionary tendencies...my liberal heart college days are too far gone.  I have resolved to make resolutions this year, though.  Resolutely.

I have never been one for New Year's resolutions in the past.  A year was too short-term and I was more interested in the long-term.  Perhaps I am victim of my own over-organization, but I always had goals laid out in front of me.  When I started my school years, I strived to get all A's.  Check.  When I was ten, I dreamed of attending an ivy league college.  Check.  When I was eighteen, I said my next step after college would be graduate school.  Check.  After the academics came the goals for career and family.  I realize these were life ambitions and not year end resolutions.  But, I didn't see any habits that needed reforming or new things that needed to be done that I wasn't already doing. 

As I've gotten older, the idea of resolutions has grown on me as a way to reflect upon life and realize more meaningful ways to live life.  Maybe I'm trying to slow things down now that I have a child.  Maybe I'm apprehensive of starting this year without a traditional "job."  Or, maybe it's the MBA in me that views a resolution as a rolling forecast or business plan.  The checklist method was a bit cold, I admit, and my early life did seem to pass in warp speed.

There are the lifelong resolutions to get in shape and eat healthy.  In 2007, I was in wedding and honeymoon planning mode while trying to get a promotion at work  (Do I hear a "check?").  In 2008, I decided to become more organic in my lifestyle, which led to the great purge of most of my personal care products, including my beloved Nars blush in orgasm!  My husband and I also had "Goal Pre-Baby," meaning we dined at Michelin star restaurants (sometimes 2-3x per week), went to the Super Bowl, traveled to six countries outside the US, saw two Broadway shows and one concert, and overall crammed in as many activities as we could.  That was a tiring year!  All 2009 lifestyle changes revolved around parenthood and baby development.  I also made the decision to leave my job and decide what I really want in a career.  Still deciding...

It's the end of 2009 and, finally, I have a real resolution.  One that is a yearlong and will take me through 2010 with results (hopefully) to show in 2011.  I resolve to write three drafts of children's books by the end of the year.  This is a 2010 goal because I'd like to attend the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI) conference in January 2011 in NYC.  I am even proud that it follows the SMART goal system - specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely.  Again, the MBA in me.

I have been thinking a lot about my writing goals these days.  It's always been a dream to get published someday.  In the past, I'd thought of writing a novel, but recently I've had an interest in children's books.  Never did I think I'd want to write a children's book.  I credit my son for this evolution.  There are not enough multicultural books or teaching materials out there that will help teach my son about his Asian-Indian heritage and that is the topic I've chosen to tackle. My initial goal is three books about Indian holidays. 

To that end, another resolution is to work and work on my writing.  I recently found out that the essay on my mom (a very edited version) was accepted for print publication in a compilation of anecdotes and essays about the influences of the women in families.  Thanks K. for blogging about this opportunity. Next year, I want to write essays/articles that I hope to submit to magazines, websites, books, and anywhere.  There is a thrill that comes with seeing your byline.  I always got a kick out of writing for my college and b-school papers. Even if nothing comes of this, I am excited to have a true resolution.

So begins "Project Write On."  Can't blame the MBA on that one, just an inherent nerdiness.

First Thanksgiving

'Too much turkey"

Milestone: 9 months

• The little one did very well on his first vacation.  Of course, now I'm reading that this was probably a bad time in his development to travel with him.  It definitely interfered with his sleep schedule and he was out of it for a week after coming back. Sleep is an issue all its own at the moment.  We're still trying to conquer that one.
• Well, we got the regular flu shot and the first does of the H1NI flu shot.  I'm thankful he's not in school or day care yet.
  
• The little one continues to show signs of fear or shyness around strangers. He has gotten especially clingy with me and wants me to hold him all the time.  Of course, he is a baby and thus easily distracted.  Give him a toy and he forgets about me.  But, sometimes he gets upset if I put him down and am still sitting next to him.
• He understands when I tell him "no" but that won't necessarily stop him from doing something. 
• He is adeptly cruising and stands up everywhere - onto my legs, the chair, the bathtub, toilet, toys, our friends backs, kitchen cabinets, trash can, tv stand, etc., etc. 
• He crawls up stairs as the picture above shows.
• He is teething and seems to have a lot of pain at night.  This is always distressing for a parent.
  

 

A.M. Travel Tip

My #1 travel tip is to pack clothes that you plan to throw out during the duration of the trip.

When I clean out my closet, I set aside most clothes for Goodwill, but I also keep a few pieces that are still decent looking for vacation travel.  On the last trip, I brought all of my camisoles that were now too loose fitting, a couple of pairs of worn socks that were on the brink of forming big holes, one shirt, and one sweater.  For my husband, this generally means very worn t-shirts and socks.

After wearing once, I throw out or leave behind in the hotel room.  This helps you lighten your load as you travel, provides extra room for your souvenirs, and decreases the amount of laundry you'll have when you return home.

Postcard: Ireland

Cliffs of Moher in Ireland

Our friends warned us that our whirlwind life of travel would end when our son arrived, but I was and am determined to prove them all wrong.  Travel doesn’t need to end when you have a baby, but your mindset about travel does need to change.  Your African safari and Amazon River cruise may be distant memories, but you’ll discover a new world that you hadn’t seen before when you vacation as a family.

For our baby’s first international vacation, our main concerns were flight time, ease of getting around the country, and costs.  We chose Ireland because of the 5.5 hour flight time from New York city, the short driving distance between the main historic sites, and the lower costs compared to other European countries.

Being the consummate overplanner, I compiled my packing lists and our day-by-day itinerary.  I outlined every possible scenario in which an eight month old might lose it (lack of toys and entertainment, too much time in the car, boring food choices, bad weather).  I wrote down three goals: (1) sightseeing in Dublin, (2) kissing the Blarney Stone, and (3) viewing the Cliffs of Moher.   As long as we accomplished those three things, we should be happy.

My husband and I chose Ireland because of the distance mainly but discovered that it is an underrated country.  The landscape is lush and green (as beautiful as New Zealand), the food is excellent (too many stories of the potato famine danced in my head), and the memorable sites are numerous. 

Sunday, 10/11/09
We arrived at 7AM at the Camden Court Hotel in Dublin after a red eye flight.  I was exhausted as I did not sleep at all on the flight because I was holding our son most of the time.  Adding to the pile of reasons why a red-eye flight might not be advantageous is that we had to wait over three hours in the brightly lit and loud hotel lobby for our room to be ready.  In the past, we would have dropped off our bags and explored the city; however, that is hardly a plan of action with an eight month old. 

After finally getting into our small room and sleeping for a few hours, we did mange to go to St. John's Green, which was walking distance from our hotel.  The little one loves nature, especially sitting in the grass, which means that we spent more time on this vacation relaxing at parks and playgrounds than rushing through cathedrals and castles.

Monday, 10/12/09
We began the day with the Dublin Pass, a double decker bus tour of the city's main attractions.  We caught the bus at St. John's Green and hopped off a couple of stops later at the Dublin Castle.  We found out that most of the castles require you to reserve a set 45 minute to 1 hour tour group in order to see the inside.  We quickly dropped the castle idea because we did not expect our son to sit still or be quiet through an organized tour.  Being new parents, we were not quite ready for the glares and sympathetic looks this would engender.  We walked around the outside area and then headed to St. Patrick's Cathedral.  The Cathedral was beautiful with gorgeous stained glass windows and grand architecture.  We happened to visit at lunchtime at which time there is a prayer service; the melodic voices vibrate through the building. 

We left there and walked past Christ Church Cathedral, which is the older of the medieval cathedrals and the official seat of the Church of Ireland and the Roman Catholic archbishops of Dublin.  We decided going inside one cathedral was enough as it was sometimes tricky to navigate with a stroller.  Luckily, we had brought our compact and lightweight umbrella stroller because doorways and sidewalks were narrow and there were lots of up and down steps. 

We finished the day with a visit to the Guinness Storehouse where we learned the history of the brew and that Guinness was celebrating its 250th anniversary in 2009.  This is definitely a site more for the parents, but my son loved the indoor waterfall.  My husband learned to pour his own pint while I lifted my self-imposed ban on alcohol to have a few sips of Guinness.  I am not a beer person, but I do like Guinness.  The building, by the way, is quite impressive.  There is a 360 degree view of Ireland from the bar at the top of the building and a free pint is included with entry into the Storehouse. 

Tuesday, 10/13/09, Jurys Cork Hotel
We left Dublin in the morning via car rental and drove down to Kilkenny on our way to overnight in Cork.  Kilkenny Castle is an imposing site.  We toured the exterior of the castle and the grounds.

We made one more stop in Cobh, a seaport town on the south coast of County Cork.  There is not much going on there except that the Titanic's last port of call was to Cobh on the morning of April 11, 1912.  The colorful buildings are indicative of many of the small towns of Ireland.

Wednesday, 10/14/09, Killarney Plaza Hotel
A ten minute drive from Cork city is Blarney Castle, which houses the famous stone of eloquence.  We stopped here, of course, to kiss the Blarney Stone.  We had not realized that the stone was at the top of the castle and the climb to the top was challenging, especially for my husband who was carrying our son up the narrow, winding stone staircase.  The experience reminded us both of La Sagrada Familia in Barcelona although that climb was more claustrophobic, more rigorous, and longer.  We made it to the top not a moment too soon.  The Blarney Stone is still set in the wall below the battlements. To kiss it, you have to lean backwards while lying down and hanging in the air as some guy holds on to you. Once kissed, the stone bestows the gift of eloquence.  Check that off the list.

Thursday, 10/15/09, Hotel Galway

Outside the town of Killarney is an expanse of rugged mountainous country, enormous lakes, and green woodlands.  The focal point is the Muckross Estate, which we viewed from the outside.  We stopped at Ladies' View overlooking a beautiful green valley.  Ladies' View provides a good view of the Lakes including the Gap of Dunloe, the Black Valley and Ross Castle.  We stopped at one of the lakes to take a boat ride from a elder Irish man who said he'd been giving tours for 65 years.  It probably wasn't the best idea as our son lost it about 20 minutes in, but I felt sympathy for the old man standing outside in the cold.

Friday, 10/16/09, Hotel Galway

The Cliffs of Moher stretch for 8km and rise up to 702 feet above the Atlantic Ocean at the highest peak.  The cliffs consist mainly of beds shale and sandstone, with the oldest rocks found at the bottom of the cliffs.  From the top, one can see the Aran Islands, Galway Bay, The Twelve Bens, the Maam Turk Mountains in Connemara and Loop Head to the South.  The main reason I wanted to see the cliffs is because I'd been to the Dover Cliffs years earlier and so I'd gotten it into my mind to visit the Cliffs of Moher, also.  And then, once I found out that the cliffs were featured in The Princess Bride, that cemented my need to go there.  The cliffs were also featured in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, which I found out after the trip.

Saturday, 10/16/09, Bunratty Castle Hotel

Our last day in Ireland.  Although we had a great hotel room, this was the most manufactured, tourist trap portion of the vacation.  Bunratty Castle and Folk Park is a recreation of 19th century Ireland, with a village and townspeople acting the part.  It's sort of like Plimoth Plantation.  The saving grace was when we stopped at a pub because my husband wanted to make sure that our son visited his first Irish pub.

I bought a bookmark with a lucky shamrock and the following Irish blessing. 


May you live as long as you want,
And never want as long as you live.

Sheero for the Indian Mother's Soul

In the state of Gujarat (the home state of my parents), Sheero is a sweet food (called prasad) that is offered to the deities and then distributed among the guests at the end of many religious ceremonies. I remember going to these ceremonies (or pujas) when I was younger and enjoying the taste of it at the end of another long, unintelligible Hindu ceremony.  It was a reward for sitting through an Indian function that I probably did not want to attend in the first place.

Sheero does not have the religious connotations for me anymore, but rather it has become my comfort food.  The tasty treat reminds me of the admirable woman that my mom is.  After my son was born, my mom came to stay with us and helped me with my son and with household chores for several months.  I would not have survived without her.  During this time, she made sheero for me every week because it is one of my favorites.  I am grateful for the family recipes and traditions that my mom has passed down to me.

Sheero is soft, fluffy, and rich and made of roasted cream of wheat mixed with milk, butter, sugar, cardamom, and almonds.  Many people add raisins and you can add fruits such as banana, grapes, apples and pineapple to give it a sweet and fruity flavor.   I love my mom's simple recipe the best, of course.  My mom has learned over the years to exclude raisins from almost everything if she expects me to eat it.  I like raisins on their own but for some reason, I don't like them mixed into my food.

Sheero Recipe

Ingredients :

• 1 cup Ravo or Sooji from the Indian store --> substitute cream of wheat from supermarket
• one stick unsalted butter --> my mom uses 1/2 cup of ghee
• 4 cups hot low-fat milk  --> my mom uses whole milk and others use water
• a little less than 1 cup sugar 
• 1 teaspoon cardamom powder
  
• 1/2 cup chopped almonds
  
• 1 teaspoon saffron

Preparation :

1. Place non-stick pot over medium heat and melt the butter.
2. Pour one cup ravo/sooji/cream of wheat and stir continuously for about 12 minutes, or until the mixture becomes slightly pinkish-beige in color.
   
3. Add hot milk (pre-heat in microwave) and stir.  The mixture may bubble so keep your body turned away from the pot.  Stir until the milk is absorbed.
   
4. Add sugar and keep stirring.  Do not let the mixture stick to the bottom of the pot.
   
5. By now, the sheero will be soft and fluffy.  Add cardamom powder, chopped almonds, and saffron and stir.  
6. Turn off the stove and keep the pot covered for about 5 minutes.

Milestone: 8 Months

Lots of excitement to report from the past month...

In addition to looking more like me and less like the exact replica of my husband, the little one experienced some firsts in the last month.  On September 28th, he had his 3rd round of vaccinations and a general flu shot.  He dropped in all of the comparable metrics - 31st percentile in length, 4th percentile in head size, and 4th percentile in weight.

First Step - Just past the 7 month mark, he learned to take a few steps after standing up.  His motivation involves moving around so he can grab something on the sofa.  Now that it has become automatic that he will stand up, he is tentatively moving around objects by coordinating his feet.  I hesitate to call it cruising because its only been a few steps here and there.  Also, my dad did see him briefly stand without holding onto anything.  He fell within seconds but that was a first, also.

First Fever - Over Labor Day Weekend, he had his first fever - almost 103 degrees.  On that Sunday, he was crying almost all day long, which made the whole experience heartbreaking.  We kept him on a steady diet of Tylenol and Motrin, which helped the fever break and bring on sleep.  A few days after the high temps went away, he developed an awful cough followed by a stuffy nose and then runny nose.  It took a week and a half for him to recover.  He lost much of his appetite during that time and barely ate.  We had his pediatrician checkup a couple of weeks later and he was down to the 4th percentile of weight (down from 9th). 

First Haircut - On October 3rd, we held a ceremony for his first haircut.  This was a tradition from my husband's side of the family and about 30 people came to the party.  The little one was quite disturbed by the crowd in such a small space and was crying upon entering the house.  He didn't settle down much as anything would set him off into a fit, especially a relative approaching him.  It was too bad because he is normally a very happy, smiley baby and most of the people there did not get to see that.  It has been in the last few weeks that the little one has developed  separation anxiety and awareness of the people around him.  He is fine in a small setting, but larger groups are scary to him. 

First, there was a ceremony in which they set out books, pens/pencils, cash/gold, and fruit.  The little one had to crawl to and pick one of those choices to determine his fate.  Books meant he would be scholarly, pens/pencils meant he would be a writer, cash/gold meant he would be well off, and fruits signified a fruitful life. He started crawling to the stack of books when he saw the folded money in front of him.  He crawled straight to the cash and was about to reach out when the crowd roared and applauded in unison.  He stopped to look at the wall of people and then looked back to my husband and me and started bawling.  I don't blame him.  I said he got close enough to the cash and we could move on to the other ceremony after I calmed him down.

Next, we had the ceremonial first cut.  My brother took a few snips of his hair so that my husband's family could take the strands to the temple later to be blessed.  The little one cried throughout this part of the day.  I was happy when everything was over and the crowd dispersed to the different rooms and outside.The little one was much happier outside playing on the trampoline with his cousin and crawling in the grass.

First Tooth - His first tooth is emerging from the bottom front of his gums.  I felt it with my finger and saw it yesterday.  I think it's developed in the last week, though, as I felt something when he was breastfeeding.  There is no mistakening the sharpness.  He has been drooling and putting everything into his mouth for a while so I am relieved to finally see a tooth popping out.  The bottom front gums are swelling as are the top front now. 

Upcoming First Flight -On Saturday,we leave for Ireland, which will be his first flight and first international vacation.  We're excited and nervous and fearful.  Hopefully, it will go well and his teething won't be too unbearable during the time.  I have lists detailing everything I need to pack, including baby food, Orajel, feeding utensils, diapers, wipes, clothes, bibs, toys, etc.  For someone who packs light, this will be a new adventure for me, too. Photos to come...

Postcard: San Francisco

I heart San Francisco as you may have noticed from the numerous mentions of it during the short existence of my blog.  It is one of my favorite places ever.  I lived there from September 1997 to August 2001, which covered the pivotal self-discovery ages of 23 to 27.  I think those years there have had a lot to do with the person I am because this was the period after college when I was learning to support myself and live away from my parents but before 30 when the realities of adult responsibility began to hit me.  It's hard to cover that impact in one blog post, so I'll keep this postcard entry to my favorite touristy things to do in San Francisco.  The list is not all encompassing as I could go on and on about the city, but I picked some of the more interesting to me.  The photos are from my last visit there in June 2007 when my husband and I covered much of my list since it was our first trip there together.

1.  Ride the Cable Car.  Walk downtown to Powell and Market Streets so you can take the route from start to finish.  There are two lines and the one we took - the Powell-Mason line - runs from downtown up and over Nob Hill (my old neighborhood) and down to Bay Street at Fisherman's Wharf.

Hang off the side like this guy, a Sox fan.  We are everywhere!

And enjoy the views.

2. Drive down Lombard Street.  Lombard Street is America's crookedest street.  Because this area of the street between the cross streets Hyde and Leavenworth is so steep, the brick paved road was created with sharp curves to prevent accidents.

Apparently, my family drove down Lombard Street on my first birthday.  We were visiting the Oakland area, perhaps as a precursor to our move to northern California when I was 2.  My family owned our first motel in a little town called Sonora that was on the drive from San Francisco to Yosemite National Park.  By the way, I have two regrets from the time I was living in SF - (1) I did not make it to Yosemite and (2) I did not visit Hawaii.

3.  Take the Alcatraz audio tour.  It is well worth it.  Book ahead and early morning with Alcatraz Cruises, so that you can spend as much time as you'd like there.  There is a short ferry ride from the wharf and then you must climb a steep hill to the top of the island where the prison lies.

My brother and I went to Alcatraz when he lived in San Francisco for a year before I moved there.  I went to visit in December 1996 and we did the tour.  This day was memorable to me because the audio tour provides a rich history of the prison and its inmates.  Also, I did not bring my walking shoes on the trip and thus had to climb up the steep, steep walk-up to the prison wearing Mary Jane block heels.  I will not forget that torture.

4.  Walk around Fisherman's wharf, aka Pier 39.  This is a touristy shopping marketplace and restaurant area.  The street is lined with souvenir stores and street vendors.

This is the city's worst tourist trap area but I still recommend it mostly because I always got a fresh crab salad sandwich and clam chowder in sourdough bread bowl there.  I am a New Englander and I love seafood. While there, see the seal lions on the dock or sign up for the tour to Alcatraz.  My parents went to the Bubbagump Shrimp Company when they were there.  I said tourist trap.

5.  Go to a service at Grace Cathedral.  Grace Cathedral was only a few blocks from my old apartment.  It is one of the city's oldest landmarks and is of the Episcopal tradition. 

No matter what your faith, it is a beautiful building and it is enlightening to attend services. My friend and I attended Easter services once when I lived there.  We were two open minded people who thought it would be a great experience to try it out.  We weren't the only ones who thought so because the church was packed and we had to stand for an hour.  I was impressed that the sermon was open-minded and inclusive of all people and even all faiths.  In fact, we were encouraged to follow our own spiritual path.

 On my last visit, I acted for the camera.

6.  Dip your feet in the frigid San Francisco Bay water. 

I always laughed when tourists arrived in San Francisco with their shorts and summer clothes.  It is California, but northern California is cold.  I never wore shorts once and always carried at least a light jacket.  I would not go swimming at the beaches.

7.  Drive across the Golden Gate Bridge even if it is covered in fog.  The Golden Gate Bridge has become the symbol of San Francisco and is recognized by its red color.  When built in 1937, it was the longest suspension bridge in the world.  It spans the Golden Gate, the opening between the San Francisco Bay onto the Pacific Ocean.

Another thing visitors do not know is that San Francisco is foggy all summer long.  The nicest weather months are September and October.  Of course, I moved to the city during the year of El Nino and carried an umbrella for the first 4 months straight.

8.  Visit Coit Tower.  Coit Tower lies atop Telegraph Hill.  It resembles a fire hose nozzle although the designers claim that is not the case. It is, however,  beautification project for San Francisco that was built using money left by Lillie Hitchcock Coit, a wealthy socialite.  The area offers fantastic views of San Francisco including Alcatraz, the Golden Gate Bridge, Lombard Street, and Nob Hill.  There are murals painted in fresco inside of the tower by local artists.

When I had lived in San Francisco, I had bought into a myth that the tower was built to honor the firemen of the city because the daughter of the wealthy family who bequeathed it had been saved by the firemen.  This is why I liked the site and I am disappointed to find out that this story was untrue.  Alas, I'll leave it as a favorite because a friend of mine proposed to his fiancee at the top of the tower.

9.  and 10.  Leave time for two day trips out of the city

These were two of my favorite trips when friends visited town.  I would almost always head north to Napa and Sonoma Valley and do a wine tour.  Mondavi was a must stop because the tour guides gave a great intro to wine making there and I enjoy the sweet dessert Muscats.  I also liked Beringer, Sterling, Gundlach-Bundschu, and Benziger.  Once in while I would drive south toward Monterey and Carmel.  This is a longer drive but much prettier along the way.  I am a big fan of the Monterey Bay Aquarium.

Postcard: Iceland

For Labor Day weekend 2008, my husband and decided to do a quick getaway to Iceland.  The year before, we'd visited Playa del Carmen over the holiday weekend and had loved it.  Although not at the very top of our list of places to visit, Reykjavik was only a 5 1/2 hour direct flight from NYC via Icelandair.   The country has numerous natural features, including glaciers, hot springs, geysers, active volcanoes, and lava deserts. We were intrigued and off we went that Friday on an overnight flight.

Reykjavik has a renowned nightlife.  Many Europeans fly in for their bachelor/bachelorette parties.  We would not know about this.  I had just passed the 12 week pregnancy mark and my stomach had settled down enough to enjoy the fresh seafood, but strong smells such as alcohol were still bothersome to my system.  And I was exhausted all the time.  We heard a lot of the wild night life from our hotel room, though!  We did visit the bar at our trendy boutique hotel - Hotel Borg.

Note, within weeks after we went, the banking crisis reached a furor in Iceland and the economy crashed.  It probably would have been 1/3 the cost to travel after that happened.  Alas...

The main shopping and walking area of Reykjavik was minutes from the hotel.  Below are two photos taken of the interior of the Reykjavik Cathedral  and of the city view from the top floor of the cathedral.

The most popular daytrip in Iceland is the Golden Circle, a collection of natural wonders and historical sites outside of Reykjavik.  We visited the Gulfoss waterfall, Geysir, and Thingvellir National Park.  The Gullfoss waterfall cascades down the white colored Hvítá River. Geysir is the home of the famous Geyser (from which the word originates) that rarely erupts and the Strokkur Geyser that erupts in 3 to 7 minute intervals. This hot springs spout boiling water to a height of 25 to 35 meters.  Thingvellir National Park is the home of Iceland´s ancient Viking parliament and listed as a UNESCO´s World Heritage site.

 

What I most wanted to see was the Blue Lagoon, of course.  The soothing, mineral-rich water is supposed to have medicinal powers. I enjoyed the contrast of the warm water with the slightly chilly air outside. Though the lagoon looks like natural landscape, it was created by run-off from the Svartsengi power plant, which pumps the geothermally heated water from a mile below the surface to generate both heat and electricity.  The excess (clean) water is ejected into the lagoon.